Soul Inquiries #001: Where would I be if not for my art?
The only thing that has ever made sense to me was the art that flows out of my body and takes form in words, textured paint birthing aquatic gardens, or the oils that drizzle from the mouths of glass jars. Nothing I co-create is without some kind of cathartic release, nothing I imagine is complete without birthing it in the material world. It quite literally pains me to hold my art inside my body, and even this kind of warm hospitality I hold for my magic is a kind of artistic creation.
To write is to celebrate form in its many manifestations. Too much abstract energy with nowhere to go and nothing to become will certainly always drive me crazy. Energy must be directed, it must be loved into form and loved out of density for it to be fully experienced. And I allow myself to experience me through my art. Because my art is an extension of my Heart, when I keep this creative energy inside my body I prevent myself from experiencing everything I can be. Creative energy is potential, and by releasing it into the world in the form of poetry, painting, and herbal magic I am giving myself the opportunity to experience my potential.
Simply defined, art is the form that we give our energetic potential when we engage ourselves without filter. It is the emancipation we bestow upon our Hearts and our minds, the dance of liberation we lead ourselves through time and time again despite believing we had forgotten.
Art without recognition or financial compensation is valid art, it is magic that has been birthed into form and another artist who can now experience their wildly valuable existence. Art is not art because it receives anything, it is art because it is the gift that uncertain artists give to themselves.
Some of the most rewarding pieces of art I’ve co-created are the ones that go without any kind of validation or celebration. They are the ones that have been brewed in the night, candlelight by my side, and eased into form with deep breaths of affirmation. I am ready, you are ready to be given to the world, but first you belong to my Heart and my Heart to you. And so the process of releasing the art is less about engaging with the world, but engaging with how we can personally benefit from our own creativity. So much is lost and distorted when we believe that our art could ever be “good” or “bad.” It could never be either, when it is the unadulterated essence of who we are at our core, that which is cosmic and divine. There is nothing “good” or “bad” about our magic, it simply is, and it must be.
All I could ever hope to do is fearlessly, if not ignorantly, pursue creativity and joy itself. I’ve spent a lot of time pursuing insanity, going down the same channels of conformity and feeling overcome with devastation when I would not mold. Self repression and censorship is one of the greatest pains we could inflict on ourselves, and I would much rather laugh stupidly at my artistic expression than pine for its possibility.
I must show up for my He(art) every day. I must continue to engage with my creativity in fearless, adventurous and trusting ways. The only thing that has ever kept me going when I experience severe lows is knowing that I can come back to myself and experience this complicated, ancient avatar of a God through my art. It is this devotion to understanding and expressing that has saved me, and will continue to offer my undying love. And so it is.
Soul Inquiries is a new, on-going series of prompts in which I engage with my mind, Heart and soul. In this series, I ask myself meditative questions and respond in written form. They are prompts meant to stimulate my own creativity and bring myself into self-exploration by slowly untangling the threads of repression around my self-expression.
Please feel free to engage with these prompts in your own practice, as well.
Previous Soul Inquiry prompts can be viewed in the tag, labeled accordingly.